Dopamine. Oxytocin. Serotonin. Vasopressin: creating the pathways to solidify this impossible pair bond. Making me silly with love."
- ivyblossom.
Autumn is easily my favourite season. New seasons of everything (!!!), baby. Though rubbish Internet connection has forced me to be awake at ridiculous hours in order to get my downloads running. Being terribly passionate about TV shows comes with a price, and unfortunately, eyebags are the least of my worries.
I have two more weeks left of my first semester doing my Journalism degree, and frankly, I'm numb to it. No more, "Ye Gods, I'll be doing this for the next 3 years!" other than for theatrical reasons. Crazy don't even cut it anymore. English is not enough. But you know, I'm cool with that.
I probably shouldn't be writing this now. My brother just commented that no one understands me today, cause I'm shuffling around the house cleaning the refrigerator while arguing with myself under my breath on the difference between fiscal and monetary policies and how much the Egyptian Revolution actually influenced the rise of street demonstrations and the like this year and isn't it cool that we are 400,000 babies away from 7 billion and in two days that One Tree Hill quote about how there are 6 billions souls in the world and sometimes all you need is one will be completely obsolete although not really since if there are 7 billion people there can also be 6 billion people but damn it I just really don't like Peyton okay and oh hey I'm 7,195 days old today but still haven't finished reading Fight Club.
Other things that I haven't finished doing include my news reports, a presentation, a critique and a little something that I have no idea what I was supposed to do. All of which I'm procrastinating in favour of this entry. Which only exists because my Internet's download speed is currently running at 11kb/s, and I still have 4 more hours to wait before my new episode of Supernatural finishes loading. Chuck's season 5 premiere can wait.
See where I'm going with this? I can't function! One week of sem break where I should catch up with my assignments — gone in a flurry of episodes of Community. It's already Saturday. I should go do them while I wait, but nope, still can't function. You know those Glamour Kills T-shirt that says Rock&Roll Ruined My Life? Change it to TV shows and I'll wear it. A proclamation of my current state of being splayed out on my chest.
I'm aware of the irony of the shirt, and so the irony remains. The things that you love are often the things that are bad for you. The things that you claim to ruin you are also the things that saved you.
I seriously can't imagine living without being passionate about something. It has come to a point that it's interlaced so tightly with my life that it will physically pains me if I have to let it go. Some people have their football, baseball, basketball. Others a particular band, artist, or music in general. Video games, fashion, food; cooking baking munching, gardening, cameras, money, sky diving, barbeque sets, koreans, cats.
I have my TV shows, and I'm crazy about them to the point that I put it before almost everything else in my life. If that makes me any different than the rest, you know, I'm cool with that.
Even if my grades don't, asdfghjkl.
I can't win.
- m.
